One of the dangers of growing older in life, and ministry, is entitlement, that we are due something, like respect. At almost 58, I most certainly have fallen in to that trap, but a new part time job has reminded me that I am owed nothing.
My wife is the CEO of a Boys and Girls Club. She over sees four clubs. In September, my wife asked me if I would step in for 6 months to take the position of Director of Teens and Outreach for these four clubs in addition to my part time youth pastor position. How can I tell my wife no?
The clubs are a 180 from my normal youth pastor position. My church youth group is made up of mostly white, with some hispanic, rural students in a city just over 1400 people. The Boys and Girls Clubs, 3 out of 4, are urban in a small city of a 114,000.
Neither my rural students nor my urban students give a crap about my past accomplishments. The only person that cares about my past accomplishments are me.
They care that I show up thinking about them not about me.
They care that I'm seeking their best not to inflate my ego.
They care that I show up and are loving and kind.
They care that I give them my best not my resume.
They care that I respect them and where they are on their journey not that they respect me for the journey I’ve already made.
If you’re reading this, you may not be tempted to fall into trap as I have, but the older you get, the more reps you get under your belt, beware, entitlement is lurking in the shadows.
The great basketball player, Julius Irving, Dr. J, once said,
"I firmly believe that respect is a lot more important, and a lot greater, than popularity."
Jesus didn't ask for or demand respect, he met people where they were. He was never too good to serve. Never too good to get his hands dirty. Jesus’ popularity waxed and waned depending on the day and the miracles he produced, but he never stopped serving.
The greatest respect I believe Jesus received is echoed in this scripture,
“When the centurion and those with him who were guarding Jesus saw the earthquake and all that had happened, they were terrified, and exclaimed, “Surely he was the Son of God!” Matthew 27:54
When even your enemies start to recognize not just what you've done but who you are, that is, to me, the highest respect you can attain.
Everyone should be respected as an individual, but no one idolized.
- Albert Einstein
The danger we face is to create idols of our accomplishments and expect others to “bow down” to them. Much like Nebuchadnezzar, I tend throw those in the fire who disagree my self assessment, which only leads to my eventual madness and eating grass in the wild.
When the temptation comes to demand respect from others, I must remember that the only thing that will earn me respect with students, rural, urban or otherwise, is practicing Philippians 2:3,
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
I won't say I've achieved respect with every kid, but that won't stop me from trying to earn it.
Have a great week,
Paul
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